I can definitely relate to some of things that you are feeling. I think that many of us experience these feelings, albeit on different levels. I completely know what you mean by feeling disconnected, and like you don't belong in the world.

That feeling of darkness and hopelessness -- do you feel like you are moving past it, at all? I have struggled with depression since childhood. There are still times when I get depressed, but the difference between then and now (before I was saved and after) is that now, even when I do get depressed (and it can get pretty bad if I let it), there is a deep sense of hope, because I know that Jesus says in His word that He will never leave me nor forsake me. That gives me great hope, and helps me get through those dark times, because I start to see Jesus, and can sort of look past the feelings, if that makes sense.

Yes, I also understand how exhausting it is to feel this way. I would have to agree with everyone else that you should find someone to talk these feelings out with. If these feelings are continuing to manifest themselves, then I definitely think that you need to talk with someone about them.

I am so sorry that you are hurting. I know that you know this, but I just really want to remind you that Jesus cares about you, and doesn't want you to go on feeling this way. Reach out to Him. He loves you more than you can ever know, and He will help you heal.

Beloved Branch
Moderator
Pink Cross Forums

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Ps. 108:13 Through God we shall do valiantly, for it is He who shall tread down our enemies

That used to happen to me alot. I never really did cry, because I come from a world where "men" just don't do that.

So I spent some time talking with a counselor about it. I realized it was just latent grief.

Whatever it is, which could be alot of things, shouldn't dominate your emotions. It's good to get it out, but letting it become overwhelming is unhealthy.

Talk to your pastor and/or professional counselor. See if they can help you pinpoint where it's coming from.
Also, get involved with a ministry of some sort. I found the best remedy for what was troubling me was working with a grief ministry here at my local church.

But by all means, check in with a professional at least once or twice, just to make sure it's not something serious.

Peace.

Diogenese

I can relate to these feelings, although mine didnt come on suddenly they just built up over a long period of time until it got to the the point were i just no longer had the strengh to fight back.

My fellings then went from should i end it to how, my first 2 attempts were unsuccessful but i was able to hide them. My third attempt was impossible to hide, but this alerted people to how i truly felt and i had no idea so many people cared for me.

Im on the road to recovery now, its not easy at times but i now know i am not alone.

So my advise to you would be to talk about your feelings, either with proffesionals or even friends and family as these problems will not just go away and they will get worse.

My thoughts and prayers are with you

Scott